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Monday, March 2, 2009, 2:59 AM
Chio & Buang. Huimin, loves :OHIIIIIIIII,
Long time no post, blah. Urhh, last few days super restless. No sleep, all brandon's fault la. Have been conf(s) w/ V, Brandon, Huimin, Vince & Vanessa's Boyfriennddd. Vanessa, Huimin, Brandon, Vince, Pingswen and many more are asking: "Got stead? Why no stead? Why don't want stead?" Yea, making me feel inferior right guys, huh huh. All got stead, only i dont have. -'- I haven't found my loveeeee yet can. :P Msn with NGHUIMIN noww. Dang god she's cute. Today was urh, normall. Morning sucked. Early in the morning fight with father. Fuck it. First take away jermaine & wiseley, now brandon & huimin also want. Cb kia. -'- I will still with them la nabeh. Long story, come sch damn peckchek. Vent on Mutepartner. She say my father siao, where got such thing. Go back class kenna scolding ah, we kenna complain. Whole class diam. Than what ah, Ah, maths and others. Science and blahhs. Recess was damn sucky. Damn dulan w/ one girl. I think she know who she is. I dont mind losing you, as long as youre not a dog. Still dare stare at me, dare diao me. Can diao at pingswen summore. You sure anot, want come find daiji with me or her? Please la, what happen to you. You're like shit now man. More and more like that bitch in the class. Day by day i cant stand you. You were once a good friend, i dont want fight with you. But you really get to me. My bros dont like me with you either. Open youre eyes and see what've you've become. Dont try to stare or diao at anyone of us, cuz you know if any of us come find you, you'll be in deep, big, shit. Well, venting fustrations on huimin, yea, father these now ignore me. Cant believe it, this year damn sucks. Today's common test was harddd, cuz its chinese. That's my worse, ever subject. I say last year as "zuo nian", god damn. I wont be surprised if i flunk it. After sch stay back w/ dexter, shaun, benneo& pingswen. Before that was playing around with dexter& teckyong :) Than ran back home by me-selff. Reached home like, noww. And total stranger. Dad's ignoring me, not talking to me, im invinsible to him. My r/s with my mum or dad just sucks. Okay, Urhmm this is like, thursday, it took me 3 days to do this post. I better finish it by today -.- First time upload photo, than post half story, than now another halff. Well today, thursday, woke up at 8. Didnt wanna go sch. Nvm just go, reach sch took fathin's or issit fatin's book and chiong hw in toilet, again. The aunty there remembers me :) She's so cute. Than assembly and blah. Going to class kenna bombarded by edmund, dexter, shaoxiong, joseph till class. Class teckyong join ah. All kick each other. Stupid, 5 guys vs. 1 girl. Than puatoh, did the like those rock guitarist slide? Yea that. My knees were sliding on the floor god damn, if got guitar more cool. Than limp back to seat. Talkk with mutepartnerrr. Than cher came, other blahs. This and that then chinese. Wanted to pon, but nobody want pei. Sad. Than want run out of class also nobody want pei. Ah, next time i rather just pon myself and go find other people. Than chinese class wanted to sleep through, but benneo and teckyong keep talking to me. Ah, after sch went to tmart with ariff and haffiz. Than met zhongxuan, than aidil, azman, ukayle, nadia & sherrin. ;o Than Ariff dunno go where, haffiz too, than w/ nadia, sherrin and zhongxuan. Nadia and sherrin left. ZhongXuan too, go back sch, saw haffiz again, he finding ariff. Haha. Reach sch slack w/ deary, benneo, teckyong, dexter & shaun. Than go vb court. See ppl play ah. Kenna hit by ball like 5 times within less than half and hour. Always kenna lorh, im not a aiming board people. Than play vb with some people, than go back home ehy. Now here, step into house father come scold ah. -'- And im damn sick and tired of this haversack craze thing. I dont know why i even bought that bag, everone's carrying it, people i startng to copy and stuff. Man the inc./zinc. haversacks are really getting to me. No free time buy new bag, im definetly gonna get a shoulder bag for sch soon. And gonna dye highlights and pierce ears in the holidays, and hazel's gonna pei me :) Jermaine is probably gonna be rush. Well, bloodsis says that want dye better dye properly, later look ahlianish. x) Any suggestions for highlight colours for me? &Im thinking of getting braces, evn though my teeth are quiet straight. But its still not the perfect teeth i'd like :) But mummy says i dont need braces. I want it perfect, why settle for 2nd best, when you can get THE best.
Bye Yaw'll,
Peace outs.
Lot'ta Love, Jannell.
[edit]
Just some personal thinkings. I think life's really crap. Not that i hate life, i really think the lives we live cannot be what we want. I mean, you either get money, love, or none. You can never get both. Seriously. I mean, life is so imperfect, there will always be problem even if you were the happiest man on earth. Why cant we have a perfect life the way we want it. I cant stand it. i think everything happens for a reason, no such thing as why this why that. Why are there people who become paikia? It's never the friends or companys fault's, its definetly something to do with youre parents. Those really super paikia, they were never close to thier parents were they. And god damn it, i really really think im turning into someone i dont want to be. Family to stranger. What's wrong with the world. Why cant things go my way for once. Hazel says that i should control. Yea i really am trying, but the further im drifting from them, i really find myself changing. I have no idea what. But for really longlong friends, like codie or hani. They'd realise it. There are alot of things in life that are really shit. But, i really dont know. I've been really troubled. I won't go to friends around my age, for a reason. I'd think i'd go find hani or codie tonight. Maybe lihui. Strange, all of a sudden talk about her. Yea, she's really nice. Hope she onlines. started to rain heavily. Rushed to close windows, saw dad. Didnt looks at me, or talk. Stranger like i said. Maybe we should just go with the flo. Turning into paikia turn into paikia lorh. Shit, tempted to smoke. Mutepartner says hard to get un-hooked. Ah, i think i should really treat mummy better, she's been supporting the whole family for years. Even though her attitude's just like dad. And really can make you go hardcore. I should try to let her go mad and smack me, and not give her some bloody attitude even though she's wrong. Ah, really confused. Any LOGICSTIC people wanna spend a whole day with me during the holidays to talk? Yea, have lots of things to say. Nurra maybe? We're going out slack anw. Well, there are many more things best left untold. Cuz a blog's really un-private. Thats all.
[/edit]
One and only,
loose heart.
JANNELL
Bare with me.Archive
Sometimes I reminiscence.